Payment in kind
I don't think I ever told anyone this, but I cried many times out of stress over my grades in my time at MIT, and countless more times I have felt … worthless.
Homecoming
I was already starting to count down the days till the first day of IAP.
What P/NR taught me
Besides encouraging me to adopt a healthier mindset when it comes to academics, P/NR has taught me to embrace a lifestyle that has a balance of work and fun.
Taiwan, I miss you
It has been five years since I boarded the plane to move back to the U.S. from Taiwan. As wistful as I was when I saw the green land vanish before my eyes, I thought I would get the opportunity to visit Taiwan a year or two after I left. But I was wrong. Each summer that followed presented a new obstacle preventing me from going back to Taiwan. I’m content with my life in the U.S., but that doesn’t mean my strong feelings of nostalgia for Taiwan have gone away. Whenever I look at old photos of me in Taiwan or flip through travel and dining books about Taiwan, a sudden surge of longing rises inside of me.
Crisp
Crisp air makes my skin feel endless, unable to tell where my body ends and harsh reality begins. All I can notice are my fingertips. Which seems weird.
Learning
Two weeks ago, I failed a math midterm. Relatively speaking, I guess. I just... ran out of time.
A good day,
The kids stole my bed, and I looked outside at orange leaves, and the air seeping through my window felt brisk instead of cold, and I knew my breath would be visible as I lived.
Reset
I’ve been wanting to walk up to MIT, shake her hand, and say “Hi. I’m Paige. I don’t think we’ve met.”
Advice for a first-year college student redux
Part of the problem is that the symptoms are very similar to the symptoms of many other mental maladies peculiar to the first year. Homesickness presents much the same way: a feeling of disorientation, of “something is missing”.
Here’s a sign
We often get into the mindset that if we can theoretically handle a certain academic load, then we should. After all, that is what got us through most of school before college.
Doing something
In the moment, and even now on occasion, I told myself that nothing felt enjoyable during COVID.
‘Although I only hear sounds, the rich dialogue and background noise make this other world feel real’
A new adventure begins every time I play This American Life, a popular radio program.
The day after
Do I deserve the happiness that I have? I don’t know, but I want to.
Offline
I think we often take the convenience of the internet for granted. There is nothing convenient about sprinting from Building 2 to Building 56 in 10 minutes.
What is culture (at MIT)?
Each dorm is fiercely proud of its culture, down to each individual hall, wing, floor, or house.
Bikes and bridges
While I can try my best to be “perfect,” it’s fundamentally impossible to achieve.
Advice for a first-year college student
“Do you know what they call the person who came in last in their class in medical school? Doctor.”
Graduation is not the end
Yes, this is a love letter to The Tech and every staff member on it, because what else would it be?
The story is not over
I’m comfortable with the word “queer,” but people still don’t get it. This secret is trapped. It has been for years.