Dr. Grammarphile
“You’re dog was tracking mud all through there house. I was literally so embarrassed that I thought I’d die!”
A “grate” salad and the sweet turned savory
I was staring at the wall of energy bars at LaVerdes, looking for a quick snack between work and exercising. Bright and colorful, they tempted the eye with bold statements like “10 grams of protein!” and “Chocolate-Caramel flavoring.” Yet even the “healthy” bars often contained more sugar than protein, and I wanted something more … meaty. Unfortunately, I don’t have the technology to produce a slab of pure dried animal flesh, so I did the next best thing: I made a batch of savory granola.
MIT protips
Well, it’s that time again. All you hordes of freshman are pouring onto campus, bright and unsullied. Some of you fancy yourselves engineers, scientists, the bright minds of the future. All so innocent, easy prey for the dangers lurking behind the institute’s marble columns. Right now, you probably think “p-set” is a dirty word.
Hell is other people
I was a freshman once. Escaping my hometown of Tampa, Florida, I went to MIT, leaving my family and high school friends behind. I was an unattached soul, with no group to call my own. Faced with the fear of being alone and unsupported, I was easily tempted by the promises of Sorority Recruitment.
The right way to write
The hardest thing about taking the SAT was writing the honor code in cursive. Well, that’s kind of an exaggeration, but after having drilled the essays and math, the cursive was the only thing that took me by surprise. I spent agonizing minutes, trying to remember how to form capital letters. When that was over with, I thought that I would never touch cursive ever again.
Missed beats
My history with music reads like an I Saw You MIT post. “I heard you, ten second music video clip of ‘Feel Good, Inc.’ on a TV commercial.” “I heard you, midi version of ‘Diary of a Madman’ on a web 1.0 Johnny the Homicidal Maniac fansite.” Yet it was only recently that I started explicitly looking for new and classic bands to listen to, and educating myself in good music.
Stand up against back pain
It’s not easy being MIT students. In addition to carpal tunnel, eye strain, and weight gain from too much free food, we must deal with back pain from sitting hunched over a desk for long hours. Fortunately, there’s a solution for that last problem: a standing desk.
Don’t get caught in a web of time sinks
The well-rounded students use IAP for vacation, avoiding the winter weather in California, or embracing the winter weather in Maine. The inquisitive use IAP to take classes in interesting subjects, such as Medieval cooking, or Japanese flower arranging. And the masochistic decide to spend IAP slaving away on 6.470, MIT’s web programming competition.
T is for terrible
Boston T, you’ve got a lot to learn from the New York subway system.
Give blood to the tree
You can buy the Sport Death shirt, and the Roast shirt, and even the Lambda Sigma Delta jersey (complete with purity score!). But there is a special rite of passage for those who want to be a true Senior Haus resident. I am speaking, of course, of learning how to tire swing.