Daily Confusion

Monday, August 25, 2008


08:00—Burton Conner—Miss the cartoons and sugary cereal of your youth? We do. Come join us for some toons and a sugar rush to start off the day!

08:00—Next House—Woeful Waffles (Next Dining and TFL): Ease the pain of an early Monday morning (and looming ASEs) with freshly-made waffles and other breakfast-like foods in our dining hall.


09:00—Baker House—Breakfast @ Baker — Early to bed, early to rise makes a person healthy, wealthy and wise! So come on down to grab a bite of breakfast before another big day begins!


10:00—EAsT camPUS—East Campus: Distilled and bottled in New Zealand by Lion Nathan Wines & Spirits New Zealand Limited. 111 Carlton Gore Td. Newmarket Auckland, New Zealand

10:00-18:00—EAsT camPUS—we’re in our dorm, tourin our frosh. Today our caged guides are tamer after last night’s party. You might have to shake them until they wake up, but we’re still giving tours. It’s one of your last chances to explore before the housing lottery closes, so, as JoeG says, GET ON IT!

10:00—Ashdown House—Every hour, on the hour, a tour guide will be waiting for you at the student center (with a big sign that says NW35) to take you to NW35, the new dorm.


10:00—Next House—Boston Walking Tours (Next House Lobby to … Who knows?): Come with resident experts from Next to see the city near which you’ll be spending the next 4 years of your life. See the hot spots for food, fun, and entertainment …all within the limits of your little frosh feet.

10:15—MacGregor—Charles River Kayaking Trip! We will meet in front of MacGregor at 10:15 AM and take a quick bus trip upriver. Explore the Charles with adventurous MacGregor residents for an hour and a half before returning to campus. (Note: you had to have signed up on Sunday!)

10:31—EAsT camPUS—When you pee on the wall, it’s basically a urinal


11:11—EAsT camPUS—East Campus: More American than Michael Phelps

11:17—Random Hall—Picture Scavenger Hunt - Boring campus tour or interactive puzzle challenge extravaganza? Difficult decision, we know. *Meet in Lobby 7 any time during this block.*


12:00-18:00—EAsT camPUS—OMGWTFBBQ. Your mother always told you to clean your plate. Come to the courtyard and we’ll pile it full of greasy grilled goodness. Listen to your mother and chow down.

12:00-21:00—EAsT camPUS—Salon du Campus d’Est. Trying to catch the eye of that special someone? With our help and hair dye, you won’t just catch their eye, you’ll blind them. In a good way...?

12:00-00:00—EAsT camPUS—Rides of Skill and Chance. See frosh. See frosh ride. Ride frosh ride.

12:00—Ashdown House—Tired from an amazing weekend? Come relax with some smoothies and soothing music. Relaxing events run throughout the day-see the schedule for details.

12:00—Baker House—Finger lickin’ good - If breakfast wasn’t enough, let’s go for lunch too! We will be ordering carryout from your favorite restaurants. Swing on by for some more, very excellent free food!

12:00—Burton Conner—Food, water guns, slip-and-slide, and our famous Jell-O Wrestling. A BC tradition, join us while we duke it out in a tub ‘o goo.

12:01—EAsT camPUS—You’d better hope that you don’t collide with an H2 in your economy car. You can kiss your ass goodbye thanks to the H2’s massive weight and raised bumpers.

12:06—EAsT camPUS—It’s not about what the lulz can do for you, it’s about what you can do for the lulz

12:17—Random Hall—Minihunt Have you ever looked Death square in the eye and shouted, “Lo, Evil One! I fear thee not!”? Well, the MIT Mystery Hunt is nothing like that. Come take a bite-sized taste of what it’s actually like.


13:00—MacGregor—BBQ! Visit MacGregor’s barbeque pits and fill your stomach while the food’s still free. We’ll have burgers, hot dogs, and vegetarian options hot off the grill. Finish it off with some watermelon and good company.

13:00—Senior Haus—HAIR DYEING color your hair awesome colors. never get a job.


14:00—Senior Haus—T SHIRT DESTRUCTION + SILKSCREENING cut shit up. tie it back together. spray shit on it. ????? profit. (bring your own, or we have shirts for you.)

14:00—Next House—Back to Kindergarten! (Next Courtyard & TFL): As you start college, you’ll find the experience very similar to another first day of school... so join us for snacktime, finger and face painting, naptime, and a MOONBOUNCE — all the great things about being 5 all over again!

14:17—Random Hall—Bacon, Onion, Garlic - You know what goes really well with garlic? Your mom. Join us for a delicious and healthy feast of four of nature’s finest ingredients.


15:00—La Casa—Join Spanish House in this traditional Hispanic cook out. Not hungry? Don’t worry, a quick match of soccer before lunch will help. Join the members of Spanish House as we remember a little bit of home and share with you our culture. Don’t miss out!

15:00—Ashdown House—Much more fun than the Boston Tea Party, the NW35 Tea Party is a great time to relax, sip some tea, and savor some scones.

15:00—Burton Conner—Old School TV Afternoon. Whoooooo loves orange soda?

15:00—Senior Haus—HAUS TOURS all day, but especially now! learn about haus history, see murals, pet our cats, meet weird residents.

15:15—McCormick Hall—Crafts and cookies! Come relax and decorate whiteboards for your door after an afternoon at the Philanthropy Event! Also, decorate some delicious cookies to eat while you’re at it and enjoy a gorgeous view!

15:17—Random Hall—Speed Diplomacy - A two week long tabletop strategy game compressed into two hours. Stab all your new friends in the back every 5 minutes.

15:17—Random Hall—Tie Dying — Turn that boring white shirt into a psychedelic extravaganza. Look at all the pretty colors.

15:33—Senior Haus—DROWNING PUPPIES 101 in the bathtubs.


16:00-01:00—EAsT camPUS—Tonight’s your last chance! Express your eternal affections for East Campus, or that other cute frosh you just met, by drawing them on a building with laser light.


16:01—EAsT camPUS—Did you know that 2% of America’s Most Wanted live at East Campus?

16:04—La Maison Française—Cooking: Viens à La Maison Française and hang out, chat, chop, and sauté as we prepare one of our fantastic dinners, which will be followed by eating of said dinner. All skill levels sont bienvenues.

16:04—EAsT camPUS—joeg’s on it

16:17—Random Hall—Duct Tape Construction — Duct tape is like the force; it has a light side and a dark side and it binds the Universe together.

16:20—EAsT camPUS—East Campus: where our president flies in a roflcopter


17:00—Senior Haus—BE YOUR OWN MESSIAH denounce the false saviors that have been fed to you by society. great photo op!

17:17—Random Hall—Juggling in Closed Spaces - Things that are more challenging in narrow hallways, partial list: juggling, poi, diablo. Random Hall: attempting to keep things airborne since January 7, 1717.

17:55—EAsT camPUS—Mario’s entries are a lot more emo than mine. Makes me want to cut myself.


18:00—Senior Haus—ALTERNATIVE SEX SEMINAR learn all the tricks you’ll never use, you fucking freshmen. direct to you from our resident experts about bondage, buttsex, and most all fetishes.

18:00—EAsT camPUS—Pick a winner

18:15—La Maison Française—Dinner: Come see for yourself why everyone says French House has the best food on campus. Vegetarian options aussi.

18:17—Random Hall—Truffle Making - Come to Random Hall and make your own delicious chocolates! Our trained chocolatiers will be on hand to help you create some tasty treats.


19:00—Senior Haus—MAKE YOUR OWN SEX TOYS because November is so far away. (for boys, girls, trannies, and Milena.)

19:00—Burton Conner—Come on down! You’re our next contestant! Show off your knowledge of useless trivia in Jeopardy, or your best pickup lines in the Dating Game. We know some of you are eyeing each other already …

19:17—Random Hall—Anti RPG — Bonfire floor’s fierce reaction to the way you played D&D in your basement. Join us for a game of cthuloid horror without the complicated rules, improbable heroics, and chainmail bustiers typical of tabletop role playing. Munchkins will be extradited.

19:30—Das Deutsches Haus—Come enjoy a tasty meal prepared by our skilled chefs and experience one of the greatest joys of living in a cultural house. Enjoy meat and veggie options in our New House 6 2nd floor lounge.

19:30—Senior Haus—SUPER SMASH BROTHERS TOURNAMENT FALCON . . . PUNCH!!!!!!!!! in the basement. snax provided.


20:00—Next House—House of Cards (Next House TFL & Dining): Ever wanted to try out for the MIT Blackjack Team? Now’s your chance, with poker, blackjack and other card games. A chocolate fountain and desserts fill out the evening’s program.

20:00—New House—New House Movie Marathon: Enjoy a night of some of the best action movies, complete with your favorite movie theater treats.

20:00—Ashdown House—Have your weariness massaged away and feel refreshed after a weekend of events.

20:00—EAsT camPUS—Express your eternal allegiance to East Campus, or that other cute frosh you just met, by drawing it on a building with laser light.

20:00—Simmons Hall—Chick Flick and Baking Simmons Hall, Country Kitchen & Lounge Miss the girls from home or just want to get in touch with your feminine side? Whip up a batch of baked goods to enjoy with one of your favorite chick flicks.

20:00—EAsT camPUS—youtube marathon. We are slaves to the internet. oh em gee squee roflcopter.

20:16—EAsT camPUS—When we do stupid shit, we think it’s really awesome.

20:17—Random Hall—Chain Mail - Come meet some of Random Hall’s amateur maillesmiths. See some impressive works and learn a few basic weaves yourself.

20:30—Senior Haus—COFFEE + POLITICAL DISCUSSION with our resident course 17 major, NICK WANG. libertarians are encouraged to come, but be prepared for ridicule.


21:00—Ashdown House—Join the frenzy of Advanced Pillow King of the Hill! If you have pillows, feel free to bring them along. Otherwise, we have a few extras.

21:00—Baker House—Movie Night and Desserts - Seven nights of partying makes one weak. Ok ok fine, it’s only been two days but you get the point. We’ll be having a chill, laid-back movie night following two days of some intense east-side and west-side bashing.

21:00—Burton Conner—Break out your Day-Glo shorts, it’s Hammertime.

21:09—La Maison Française—La vache mâche sans relâche dans le champ où le chien niche tout en léchant son chiot naissant.

21:17—Random Hall—Heart Attack Food - I didn’t ask if you were a vegetarian, I asked if you wanted some f*%@#$! bacon.

21:47—Random Hall—Origami Architecture — folding of paper/ establishment of structure/ they go together


22:00—Senior Haus—S’MORES AND STORIES OF SENIOR HAUS PAST what does SPORT DEATH mean? oldfags and some alums (WHY HAVEN’T YOU LEFT YET) reminisce about the fucked up shit they’ve seen and done in the haus. courtyard.

22:00—MacGregor—Movie Night! You choose the movie from MacGregor’s extensive movie collection and then sit back and enjoy. We’ll provide all the candy and popcorn you can eat, while telling you how residents can rent movies from MacGregor desk during term… for free!

22:17—Random Hall—Nerf Shotgun Showdown — Our main lounge is a war zone, and your weapon is a nerf shotgun. Boom! Headshot!


23:11—Senior Haus—11 11 PM SUPER GAY EROTIC BOOTY DANCING courtesy of Neal.

23:17—Random Hall—Culinary Construction - Ever made famous landmarks out of food? Neither have we. There’s a first time for everything.


23:59—EAsT camPUS—Look around you. Just look around you.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008


00:00—Next House—Make Your Own Pizza (Next House Basement/Country Kitchen): Learn to fight off those midnight hunger pangs with the most complete food group … pizza! Bring Your Own Appetite.

00:00—Senior Haus—CULT MOVIE NIGHT kicks off with “Live Freaky! Die Freaky!”, a musical, claymation re-telling of the Charles Manson murders. goes on all night.

00:00—Ashdown House—Celebrate the birth of our new dorm in style as we serve cocktails and hors d’oeuvres. Suave and chill is the name of the game at this posh new place.

00:00—Burton Conner—Action Movie Marathon. Explosions are cool.


03:17—Random Hall—RHOP - Breakfast at 4 AM. Question is, is it really early or really late?


07:30—EAsT camPUS—WHY SO SERIOUS? Heath Ledger is dead, so come to East Campus


08:00—Next House—Weary Waffles (Next Dining): Tired of REX yet? If not, come to Next Dining and grab some breakfast before another busy day- more fresh waffles!

08:00—Burton Conner—They’re magically delicious.


09:00—New House—Waffle Breakfast: Drop by and start your day off with a delicious waffle breakfast, complete with your favorite toppings.

09:00—Baker House—Breakfast @ Baker - If you need any more convincing as to why Baker House is the best, most social, and friendliest dorm, stop by once again for a fabulous breakfast!